Dark Days for Me...(1:30PM Update)

I am going through what I call an, "emotional funk." It happens every once in a while. Just not sure what brought about this one, but I have a feeling.

I had a reading with my medium Judith and she told me that my mother said I would have 4 kids. I asked if the other 2 would be Asian or Ethiopian. My mother said, No, they would be American. I thought that there just was no way. I would never consider adopting American only because the courts rarely side with the adoptive family if something should happen. I have seen it happen. I do not want to cry. I do not want to live in fear that someone, a relative of the child(ren) will come and take the children away.

It happened very fast. Within a week the words my mother told me came true.

At Ellie's dance recital on June 1 a woman sat next to us. She was very nice. An older woman, 77 years old, and we talked.

She told me that she was the grandmother of a 6 year old girl who would be in the recital. She also has a 10 year old grandson. Their names are California and Ian.

She explained to me that she was to visit an attorney the next day to discuss what to do if something should happen to her. She was worried for the children. The aunts and uncles did not want the children. They would be left to the children's home society as orphans if she died or became unable to care for them. The children's mother died of Lukemia last year. She was their only connection.

She needs someone to adopt the children. My brain was humming. My ears ringing. It was amazing. Judith was right. 2 kids. Both American. Was this the situation my mother told me.

Then a sign came. The grandmother told me her name.

Her name is Ellie. I nearly keeled over.

Now back to my emotional funk. I think my distress comes from my inability to reach out and call her. She called last week. Fred told her I would call her back. I am planning on calling today to see if the "funk" goes away. Perhaps my delay in calling is causing my dark cloud.

I have a few concerns. Though we would be a great family we wonder if Ellie would get lost in the shuffle. Additionally , I worry that there will be a concern about religion. Ellie attended a church dance school. One of the questions the grandmother asked is, Are you members of the church?. Those who know us will understand. I fear she will tell us, "No thank you," when it comes to this issue. It weighs heavily on my mind.

We shall see. It's 930am and I left a message on their phone.

1:30PM Update:
It looks like an adoption will not happen. There is just too much there that would make me uncomfortable. We are going to meet the children on July 5th. I would love to meet them and perhaps we can all become friends. Ellie and Callie are about the same age. Ian might take to Fred.