My Mother's Passing. 4 Years This Week

Yesterday I made the mistake of writing my mother a letter. You see she passed away from complications of just about everything 4 years April 22.

I started....Dear Mama, Then the tears began. You must understand that I most certainly never cry. The tears I cry are from stress not emotion.

So after I got over the first set of weepy fuss I began to write again.

Dear Mama,

I miss you.

Then the tears began again and I needed to get up to get a second tissue. It was a good thing that both my girls were napping. All of the sniffling and gasping made up quite a bit of noise.

So after that bit of emotion passed and I knew that I would have to wash of any remaining traces of my make up I began writing again.


Dear Mama,

I miss you. I love you.


The tears kept coming.

By the time I finished the letter I was an unholy mess. I am not usually so wretchedly sad. I posted it on the blog but then an hour later removed it. Too personal. I think only one person accessed the blog in that hour.

I usually write my mother a letter this time of year. This year is particularly difficult. My father is planning on doing something I find abhorrent. If he does what he says he will I may never forgive him. His promised deed is making this week that much more difficult.

I have friends and family to talk to. However, this week is such a personal event I tend to turn inward. It's just me.